What Are The Challenges Faced By Adult Children In Planning For The Future?

One of the main challenges faced by adult children in planning for the parent’s future is getting the parent to take action, including overcoming feelings of a loss of independence and other misconceptions. The second challenge is in organizing and managing finances. The third challenge is determining how to pay for care when the parent’s income does not cover it.

Step 1: The Adult Child Needs to Have Some Degree of Control, or Ability to Control in the Future

In most situations, it’s very easy to talk to a parent about getting a power of attorney or a trust done so that upon the parents’ incapacity or diminishing capacity; upon request by parent, the child can take over all the financial management with minimal fuss using a durable power of attorney, designation of healthcare surrogate, and maybe even a revocable trust. Simple statements like, “You know you need to get this done, let’s do it!” Or “Remember that disaster that ‘So and so’s’ family experienced whether their mom died, do you want us to go through that?” Or “if you do not take care of your legal documents, you could end up in a guardianship and I heard the legal fees can exceed $20,000 or more!”

When dealing with private or stubborn parents, it can be difficult to set up a framework that gives a caregiver control of the ability to pay bills, managed investments, and make financial and medical decisions. It may take time, multiple family members and advisors to consistent educate the elderly parent about the problems that occur without prior planning. Now, if a parent is unreasonably stubborn and does not have capacity or control over their finances, then the caregiver may need to seek guardianship as a final option to gain authority to act on behalf of the mentally incapacitated parent.

Step 2: The Adult Child Needs to Understand the Financial Picture and Establish a System

When it comes to organizing and managing finances, some parents only have a house or a savings account, which simplifies things for the children who are in charge. However, some parents may have their financials arranged through multiple investments, annuities, life insurance policies, and retirement accounts, and the child or children may not have the time or financial knowledge necessary to handle everything. Sometimes caregivers are left in a fog as to how things are being managed, either because the finances were disorganized or because there was a lack of full disclosure. Getting your parent to walk you through all their financials (assets and investment decisions, debts, income, and monthly expenses) saves the caregiver a massive amount of time and stress.

Step 3: The Adult Child Needs to Learn How to Make the Money Last When Getting Care for the Aging Parent

If a parent’s assets or income are insufficient to fully cover the costs of their needs, then the caregiver will need to identify other sources of benefits, such as VA benefits, Medicaid and long or short-term care insurance. In many cases, the aging parent’s assets may be insufficient to immediately qualify for these programs or these programs are to time-consuming and difficult to navigate, and you’ll need to enlist the aid of an elder law attorney.

What Happens When Someone Consults An Elder Law Attorney In Caring For Their Parents?

Remember, the elder law attorney usually will represent the aging parent and you may be working with the attorney in your role as an agent under the durable power of attorney. Usually, your goals will be aligned if you have your best interests of your parent in mind.

During an initial consultation with an elder law attorney, we will always start with the client’s goals, which vary from caregiver to caregiver, who must make decisions in the aging parent’s best interest and consistent with their stated intentions. Sometimes the first appointment occurs at the very beginning of when you think your aging parent needs help, and I will meet with clients for pre-planning and preparation with the parents. In many more cases, a parent will be in the hospital or in a nursing home. Elder law attorneys can deliver at either end of this care spectrum. We will want to determine our short-term and long-term goals because goals will shape the conversation.

Once we determine our goals, we will discuss the parent’s diagnosis and capacity for completing activities of daily living, such as bathing, dressing, transferring, using a toilet and preparing meals.

Once we assess their care situation, we will cover the family situation, marital status, whether or not stepchildren are involved, and whether or not the children will have any sort of issue that could cause problems with asset protection or other processes.

We will review pertinent financial accounts to ensure that we have a clear understanding of them because this can be difficult for some people.

We will also have a discussion about whether or not any existing legal documents (a trust, power of attorney, will, living will, designation of healthcare surrogate, etc.) need to be modified in response to changes in the law or in the person’s situation. Then we will discuss whether the aging parent is able to understand (mental capacity) and make changes or articulate their desires in modifying those legal documents.

Once we complete our discovery phase, we will give options to the client or the agent under power of attorney and educate them during the consultation. Given the factual situation that we will have already covered during the consultation, the options discussed will be intended to meet the associated goals. We will usually go through a dialogue of follow-up questions and answers in order to tailor the specifics of the plan to the goals. We will evaluate the strengths and weaknesses of each option against the others, including the option of doing nothing. By the end of the consultation, we’ll have a framework for meeting the client’s goals. In most instances, we require a minimum flat fee retainer for our legal services and the implementation of that plan.

For more information on Challenges In Caring For Aging Parents, an initial consultation is your next best step. Get the information and legal answers you’re seeking by calling (904) 398-6100 today.

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